the gloves are off, ladies and gentlemen

voting out marisa was probably the most uncertain i've been in the whole game. my decision came down to a few things. i was feeling a little sketched out between spencer's paranoia and marisa's lack of communication, which made me a lot less confident about sticking with Ki for this vote. i also did feel like i owed kat something after she flipped for me last round. most importantly, though, it hit me last night that my resume is pretty void of definitive game moves. sure, i've had a pretty solid social game that helped me in winning the loyalty of key players throughout the game, and i showed strong loyalty and honesty, but i had little to no ~game moves~ that i could sit in front of a jury and say, look, this is something that i did. by voting out marisa, i feel like i've almost guaranteed myself a spot in the finals. it's hard, because i didn't want to go against spencer like that, but he's got a solid gamebot streak to him and his actions since the challenge results made me confident that he would never have wanted to sit next to me at the end. i feel validated that i made the correct move, all things considered.

this is really my game to lose at this point. i just need to survive this vote, win immunity, and handle the final tribal correctly, and i think i can do this. it's so unreal to me that i'm not only sitting in the final 5, but i have a real actual chance of winning my first ORG. somebody wake me up because i must be fucking dreaming lmao

I'M SO ANXIOUS

kat's sworn up and down that julia is keeping me but i can't help being paranoid that maybe she won't!!!