Quote

Welcome to your confessional! This is your private haven, meaning that everything that you post here can only be seen by the Hosts and the Prediction Writers. Your secrets are safe with us. (Unless G0girl is here in which case lol ur shit outta luck.) On this board, you will cast your votes, do some challenges and pour your heart out. The more you confess, the happier we are! Though we can't make you confess, the more you do, the more likely you'll be to return in future seasons. Try and keep us updated! Refer to past season's winners and finalists for an understanding of what this is usually like. Though we read your application, a lot of our viewers (or "Prediction Writers") didn't. Here are a few questions for you to answer! Answer them well, and you might get picked for our fantasy teams!

Don’t pick me for your fantasy teams. WE ALL KNOW HOW WELL THAT WENT LAST TIME. Also, there’s a decent chance I’ll pick up Frank’s pre-merge curse given my alias pick. Like living in someone else’s skin, really. (We’ll ignore that OTHER people can play as Jonny Fairplay because really where’s the fun in that?)

Quote

1. What's your strategy going to be like? If you've played ORGs in the past, what was a strategy that's worked well and gotten you far? What is the most fun you've ever had in an ORG? What do you think might be your downfall?

Man...getting some serious deja vu from these questions, I CAN’T IMAGINE WHY. But yeah, honestly like - my strategy hasn’t changed a TON from the last time I played. If I’m in my ideal spot, I like to play the middle, shave at both sides, and make my number indispensable regardless of any (friggen odd’, if you ask me) jury threat status I may have.

I think the major issue I had last time was that I didn’t account for the series lack of cross tribal communication, and that seriously hurt me when we had the pseudo-merge. I like to think I had DECENT relationships with the people I was on tribes with, but I was too confident in them, and didn’t feel the need to do my best to connect with people I KNEW would be in power positions like Dreamz. So, when they got back together with their buddies, and they saw me as active and a threat - yeah, my throat got slit HARD.

So, I figure that, WHENEVER I meet someone new, I need to do everything in my power to like, be friendly and approachable and whatnot. I think I’m gonna be less aggressive about making alliances early on - I usually like the safety, but I should be fine early on sheerly due to activity. Being a free floating electron in a swap scenario, which is gonna happen because this is TWISTED, is a more preferable option to like, “certain” safety. Ideally I get pulled into something with a more visible threat - I don’t want to like, be seen as a ringleader like I was with Leanne.

Quote

2. What real Survivor would you align with? Who would you never align with (and don't say Russell)?

I’d allign with Alecia Holden because it would be super fun and America would adore me. And I could totally see Fairplay aligning with someone unpredictable and seemingly useless - see, Morris, Lil. I don’t see myself aligning with like, a Jason type - has all the negatives of a Russell without any of the loyalty.

Quote

3. Which popular Survivors do you not like? Which do you think is the best of all time? What's your favourite season? What is your favorite moment in Survivor history?

Popular ones? I mean I don’t really dislike a TON of Survivors, aside from the usual suspects, but I don’t wanna give the same answer as last time. Is Monica Culpepper popular? I don’t really like her.

Best of all time is JT, no question. Dude is the Triple Threat and people STILL think he's a bad player because of Heroes vs. Villains - it's kinda hilarious, really. Favorite season is Nicaragua, because Fabio is glorious and the entire cast offers something. (Yes even Purple Kelly.) MAJOR Marty and Naonka fan too. Thinking of my favorite moment of all time is pretty tricky, but I DID like Hold Up Bro quite a bit, so let’s go with that.

Quote

4. Why will you be the Sole Survivor of Twisted: Ukiyo? Are you a hero or a villain?

...I feel like these are two very, very different questions. I’m still gonna answer them, but I need to let you know your spacing is atrocious and you should feel bad about it. (See? N-tone. Fairplay baby.)

I’ll be the Sole Survivor because...uhh....hmm...gimme a second...

...I’ll get back to you.

Honestly I don’t really buy into the whole hero or villain dichotomy, but coming off a STRING of second place finishes (seriously it’s four in a row now although really should we be counting twists) there HAS to be something I’m doing wrong like, socially. And since I’m pretty strategic, I guess that makes me a villain?

You know what? Fuck it, I’m gonna steer into it. Jonny Fairplay is supposed to be a villain, so let's be one this go' round. (Insert Evil Laugh #5C here)

Quote

5. What element of Survivor do you value most? Stategic? Physical? Social? Something else?

Social. It’s a game about interacting with other people - kinda the name of the game. Like, personally, being interesting to talk to is like, 99% of my alliance criteria, strategy be damned.

Quote

6. What are your very first impressions of your fellow cast members and their alias choices?

I meaaaaan not everyone has signed in, and I haven’t talked to anyone outside that meet n’ greet thread. I try not to extrapolate TOO MUCH from those, but some stray thoughts:

- Love the Matty Whitmore rep pick. If he has an iota of interesting...ness(?) to him I will try and work with him until jury. Maaaaaaaaaaaassively underappreciated player and character.

- Sugar’s posting a lot, and she’s posting long-ish things - but it’s like, I dunno. It’s not really funny or interesting stuff. Maybe I’d be more into it if I followed Celebrity rehab stuff. Probably not.

- Michelle’s first post has me like...torn I guess? Like, I curse up a storm - in real life fucking is probably in my top ten most used words, Bender style, at least with friends and stuff. But oxycotin up the cooch, while somewhat...vividly imagined, is - I dunno, it kinda seemed a bit too like, edgelord to me. I wonder if she's gonna be super OTT.

- Anyone playing as characters from the current season loses points with me. Like, I debated playing Nick, as probably his singular supporter in existence, but none of us know how their arc is gonna end (well unless they're already voted out I guess) so it's just like, kinda passe in my oh so humble opinion.

Quote

7. Try your best to make us laugh!

Don’t worry, you’ll have plenty of opportunity to laugh when I attempt to play this game.

Quote

Any questions? Let us know.

What the fuck are bounty points and can I have all of them?