Luckily for you two, my laptop broke today. I've been on campus all day trying to do homework in this creepy ass computer lab by myself and so my planned 30 minute long video with misdirection, a shit ton of questions, me insulting you, and a Sue Hawk mask has been scrapped. (Choice bits included: Austin failing to compute any type of human empathy, the astounding rate of which my opinion of Monica fell during the final 3 TC, if you guys hold stock in any lube companies considering how often Austin fucked the jury in the ass, and if Monica's knees hurt from being on them the whole game.)

Anyway.

Three questions.

1. How totally sweet is it to be Sue Hawk?

2. Insult each other for once. Sorry, insult each other for once? Stop sucking each other off and tell me why the other SHOULD NOT win.

3. What is ONE MOVE you made that should seal your victory? Not a move you were involved in, don't tell me your whole game, and make this short. I'm sick of reading novels from you guys about how perfect your games were and how secretive and amazing you two are. Fuck that. One move. Nothing you coattailed on. Nothing that Rory actually did that you're trying to take credit for. What's something you took initiative and did?

Congrats! Real proud of you two.

Boo I want the video. Anyways,

1. Sue Hawk <3 I assume you are talking about the actual real life Sue Hawk, who is a legendary Survivor character. I just recently rewatched Borneo and she legit remains my favorite of that season. I'd love to see what a 2015 Sue Hawk playing Survivor looks like lmao.

2. OMG I could never say anything mean about Monica.....lol jk let's do this :sneaky: :sneaky: :sneaky:

Oh, Monica. I kind of expected more of her patented Monica ~realness~ and tell-it-like-it-is attitude, but I've found a lot of her arguments in this final jury thread to be shockingly vanilla and Austin-esque, and more than a little kiss-assey. Just look at her opening statement, where she literally had a list of every juror where she basically just told them how amazing and wonderful they were. Not very Monica-esque, at least not the one that I got to know in this game.

Anyways, the main crux of her argument for why she should win seems to rest on 2 points: A) Austin is so evil & manipulative and b) I didn't betray anyone. I see what she's going for--it's the Natalie White/Sandra Diaz-Twine approach of making the argument less about her game and more about why I shouldn't win. But I'm going to argue that Monica is certainly no Sandra, and not even a Natalie. The reason why those two ladies managed to win the game over Russell was because they were actually decent to people throughout the game, and I think we all know that Monica could be far from decent in this game. She was a frantic, aggressive personality who took pleasure in basically playing with her food before she ate it. I'm the opposite, I just downed it as quick as possible. But in the end we both She often acted without thinking and would do something mean or mocking and then play the innocent afterwards as if she didn't mean it. But that doesn't take away the fact that there was some insensitive meanness in her actions, just as there were in my own at times. It was very Brandon Hantz to Edna Ma-esque. Apologies don't wipe away everything. And I can say the same thing about myself, but Monica has gotten off much easier for her rudeness than I have because she was ~real~ the whole time. Which, ok then. :\

What bothers me the most, however, is the fact that she seems so doggedly intent on removing herself from an complicity in all of y'alls vote offs. She claims to have been so opposed to my agenda to play both sides (which she calls complete bullshit), but never really worked to do anything about it and in fact was very often enthusiastic about it. I'd respect her argument a whole lot more if she at least took some kind of credit for being involved in the plans, but no according to her it was all me. So if she's going to give it to me, I'll take all the credit. (: I'll also dispel the myth that she never "betrayed" anyone. I don't think it's as black and white as "I didn't vote for you so I didn't betray you". The girl knew about all y'all going home just as I did and never said anything. Period. Lastly, one of her main points is that "she survived being targeted more. Well, she survived a lot of them because of our secret relationship, and in addition that doesn't necessarily have anything to do with deserving to win. Because then Garrett would have been more deserving in the finals against her simply because he survived more votes.

Anyways, in summary: Monica is trying to play the guilt-free Natalie White/Sandra Diaz-Twine card. But she's played just as rude and socially tone deaf game as I have. So she doesn't have a whole lot to hang her hat on. I'd just like her to take credit for something. That, and she doesn't seem to have been nearly as ~Monica~ as I was expecting in her final jury answers. I think she's been a bit more Mick Trimming in this final tribal...feckless.

3. The one move I'm most proud of, and that helped clinch my win would be convincing Garrett & Sierra to basically allow us to vote out Kelley (along with you) at the double boot. And this was my doing, since Yve just wanted to quietly do it without telling anyone. Basically, it took us convincing Sierra & Garrett to do something completely against their best interest and let us vote out someone they were with. That positioned me in a Final 6 with no one really mad at me besides pariah Caryn, who nobody wanted to work with out of fear. Otherwise, I would have had 3 people mad at me and it could have gone to 3 vs. 3.

1. no. I meant me. reanswer that.

also I don't actually watch survivor so your references mean nothing to me.

Sue Hawkroach @ 12/4/2015 18:21

1. no. I meant me. reanswer that.

Lol. Again, I can't tell if that is a joke or not so I'm just gonna answer it. XD

1. It definitely is very sweet. You get a cool cockroach outfit, you (I think) clearly had more fun with this experience than the rest of us, and you survived a shit ton of votes as the target. But at the same time your laptop broke (ouch) and you are on the jury so...it all balances out (:

Sue Hawkroach @ 12/4/2015 18:28

also I don't actually watch survivor so your references mean nothing to me.

Ok well the basic gist was that Monica's argument was based around the fact that I'm an awful person and she was the more palatable alternative. When in reality, she's been pretty on par with me in terms of awful things and she seems perfectly willing to give me much of the strategic credit in a lot of her speeches. She's banking too much on everyone hating me and not selling herself in particular. That was it in a nutshell, hope I got at least some of that across despite the names. *shrug*

Anyways, if any of this was sarcastic and I wasn't supposed to actually answer then.....lmao. But hey, I can't detect social cues so :erm: ;)

thanks for more of the same dude! onto whatever Monica comes up with.

1. It is really sweet to be Sue. I mean you have a boyfriend that wants to do the Amazing Race with you. I literally can not imagine a more sweeter thing.

2. Austin is often boring, stodgy, and unfun. He talks in very simple niceties and pleasantries rather than talking like a human being. Very mechanical with the robot setting turned to 'aggressively strategic'. Fun was not necessarily his objective -- which was my objective, given this is a game for no money. He should not win because his game was not fun. My game was messy and fun. Vote for me.

3. Acting on Erik telling me about his plan to boot Austin.

3. that's not a move. What did you do?

eh whatever. it's time for the snake to eat the rat.