Hey everyone, my name is Tim Ratliff. These are NOT the Sausage Island 9 Awards and I will never be presenting them. This next award is not

MOST HEROIC

at all. That's coming up later, dumbass. The person who is definitely winning this award is....


































































































































































Congratulations!

Just kidding.

Who fucking cares about the "Most Heroic" pussy ass bitches, let's get to the next stupid ass award in this dumb game.

MOST VILLAINOUS

Here's the person who excels best in being a gigantic fucking asshole. Congratulations you little fucking bitch. You wanna fucking go?




































































































































































Who the fuck is that? I'll fuck you up.

OKAY EVERYONE!!!! It's time for the best award eveeeerrrrr presented by ME! Gregory Buis!

BEST ALLIANCE

And the sexy ass bitches that have won this award areeeeeeeee....
































































































































































































HAG HAVOC + RORY!

omg sexiest alliance of all time right? OMG SLAAAAAAYYYYYY! THREE VETO GODDESSES! Congrats everyone!

ohhhhhhhhhhhh men tru tru tru it is time for most strategic which is player who did the best in challenges!

MOST STRATEGIC

oh men where to begin, the great strategy wizard of the season goes to....




























































































































































tru tru

Today is the big day! I have some very exciting news for the upcoming award. Now that I have more free time available, I will be presenting the next award as my next big project.

BEST CHARACTER

I'm trying to keep everything in working order as best as I can as I reveal the most riveting character of the show! Thanks for everybody's patience. See you on the boards.


















































































































































































Honourable mention: Monica

It is raining.

Howdy.

It's time to present the next big award for this here ceremony.

CHALLENGE WHORE

This is AMERICA'S AWARD! Even though "whore" is rightly mentioned there in the title of this award, it is a GUARAN-DAMN-TEE that no woman or homosexual is winning this one on my red, white and blue soil. No siree! Let's get cracking.

















































































Congratulations! Sure glad a strong Christian white man has won as it should always be, but why do you have such a feminine name?

Hey everyone! It's time for the next award. I'm currently being fed the winners on Skype which is kind of funny, as I get all the insider information that is going on right now. Like a door opening and creaking REALLY LOUD and Curtis picking up his headphones. "That is the SQUEAKIEST door close I have ever heard". He's right! Now he's sitting down and typing. What could he be typing? "What are you typing?", I ask. "None of your business!" Fine.

MOST SOCIAL

Time for the most social, much like I am a social queen. That's me, Greg Buis! Curtis is currently sucking his fingers.




















































































































Most likable is next! I was just told the winner of that is

You know what? It's 3 AM. I'm sitting here doing awards for two people who could be doing this themselves. But no, they ask me....

I'm not good at this....

MOST LIKABLE

Vic, you're such a nerd.




















































































































































































Haha who smited me?

Heeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

Man I'm like fucking here just going on this thing for tribal council or some shit like I dude I had a fucking dream like I had a fucking dream man that dude dude listen I had a fucking dream about Sausage listen I had a dream that like fucking Sue won Sausage Island 10 as Will from Survivor World's Apart and this big fucking gif that curtis put on the uh the fucking uh dude the front page was will sliding down a ramp like a beached fucking whale with CONGRATULATIONS SUSAN in big fucking pink font on the top with glitter and shit man that shit was fucking awesome man but anyway i am here to present the award for best tribal council or some shit but thats good cause im here IM HERE its greg dude im greg the fucking space lobster here to rule your world or some shit man fuck

BEST TRIBAL COUNCIL




































































































































TIE: Kim's blindside & Vytas' blindside

come on inside man

YOOOO DAWG THIS IS WHAT WE FUCKING DO HERE IN MO'FUCKING SAUSAGE FUCKIN' ISLAND MAAAAAAAAN'G YA'KNOWWHAIMSAYIN?! WE HERE TO PRESENT THE BEST FROM THE WEST SIIIIIIDE HERE AT SAUSAGE H-TO-THE-Q YO YA'KNOWWHAIMSAYIN, IT'S YO HOMEBOY G-BUOY IN THE MO'FUCKING HOUSE FOR THE NEXT MO'FUCKING AWARD AND HERE WE FUCKIN' GO LIKE A FUCKIN' BIG BLACK FUCKIN' DICK IN YO ASS YOU DIG YA'KNOWWHAIMSAYIN?

SHOW ME SOME KRILLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA SON! LOUD AND MO'FUCKIN' PROUD THATS WHAT I DO THAT IS HOW WE DO IT YO BOYYYYYY YA'KNOWWHAIMSAYIN? WHAT? YEAH!

BEST RIVALRY

YO IT'S TIME FOR SOME BEEF SON! SLINGING SOME MO'FUCKING DIRT LIKE A COUPLE OF HO'S IN A MUD PIT DAWG, YA'KNOWWHAIMSAYIN? YEAH! MY DAWG! HERE WE MO'FUCKING GO!
















































































































































vs.

THIS IS HOW WE DO IT SON! GRATZ AND HUGS AND HANDPOUNDS TO ALL YA'LL WHO BEEF IT BEST BUT ONLY THIS SHINY ASS MO'FUCKING DICK LOOKING AWARD BE GOING TO YOU TWO PLAYAS FOR BEING THE MO'FUCKING BEST YA'KNOWWHAIMSAYIN?

Also, companion menagerie, misty, giovanni, and yep.... gary fucking oak. kingston and fire ant was slow to start with building a solid little corp with some friends on skype! Romney just keeps spinning and deflecting like a pro. (ex: tractor sounds, "euuuuhhhh").

MOST ENTERTAINING

SPORTS ENTERTAINMENT ACHOO GOD DAMMIT Rough meaningless sex, that's how you do it?

































































































































Avoiding the question cause you don't win the prize on the internet. I would drag my dick through 10 miles of broken glass for her to tie me up Fallout 3's AI is universally praised

I'm sure you all know what this is about.

This, as you all know, is the award ceremony for Sausage Island 9. This game was good. Not as good as Survivor Generic Tropical Island or Survivor Jizz Valley. But you tried, Lex and Brett, and I respect you guys for that. For some others... somebody is jealous~

This in regards for some very inappropriate events that occured during the course of this game. And for that, you will pay with your life. WHICH MEANS that you're banned! BANNED FOREVER! Even your zombie can't read this XD XD XD. You were warned once. You were warned twice. And for your third, you will be executed.

This is, of course as you all know, in relation to....



JONE-ASS. Listen here, Jone-ass, you may think it's funny to harrass the players of this game with your terrible, nasty, disgusting avatar but it is a direct violation of my "respect" rule around. AS PER RULES, you were requested several times to change that avatar to a standard one that fits our dress codes. You did not. Not only that, you posted several nasty, hateful, racist comments. I uphold these rules to be FAIR. What I'm doing now is FAIR. Heck, I gave you several chances before so this should have happened weeks ago.

As such, Jone-ass is executed from this game and is BANNED from ever showing his face here again. Good luck getting casted for any other games in the future. If anyone has any questions, please let me know. I apologize for any stress this entire hullabaloo has caused us!

Now! Time for the award for

Biggest Game Changer

No, Jone-ass being another victim of LIVIDGREGORY is not the biggest game changer of this season, as entertaining as this very public and embarrassing execution was. So let's see.









































































































































Austin strikes first! (Austin gets Erik out before Erik gets him)

Congratulations, Austin. I hope you're happy to have won this award is for this very sub-par series.

I don't know what the fuck is going on.