The more I do this challenge, the more depressed I get. This situation just sucks so much :( I went from being completely safe on OG Escencia to being nice and comfy on NuEscencia to being completely powerless and at the mercy of the TwEpic Twinkies + Mikey over here. It fucking sucks. Like EVEN IF Erik loses this challenge and goes home, EVEN IF I am spared during the next round too if they for some reason decide to take out Zamanda, and those are like two huge IFs because I don't see why Eric and Fabio won't just take me out now that I have nowhere to go. But say those two big IFs happen, I lose two people who I can safely put a fuckton of trust into. I just feel so fucking defeated :( I made 2 huge blunders - one when I got duped by fucking Fabdouche of all people and second when I messed up the BB round and didn't make Dolly HOH. So it's only fair that I pay for my mistakes with a pre-jury placement. But I am annoyed because that other tribe is filled with opportunities and I may not be anyone's #1 ally but I have so much room to play over there. This tribe is just a fucking terrible place and its so goddamn depressing.
The AmERICan Hero is doing 2 threads at the same time. But why??? I hope he messed up on one :P But then I have to be the one to beat Erik :o Sheeesh this round is fucking stressful.
My head hurts. My throat hurts. My stomach hurts. My eyes hurt. But DAMN it if I will give up. NO. FUCKING. WAY. I might mess up. That is possible. But I ain't willingly stopping. Not just for me. If Erik wins I might very well be voted out. But if its not me, it will be Zamanda. And I can't stand by and watch as she gets voted out. That right now is my motivation. I am not just fighting for me, I am fighting for her too. And EVEN IF all I buy is one more round, it will be worth it because she will be with me. And totally unrelated (but not really), this song is giving me so much strength right now
Sooooo Erik told me his time. 16 hours 15 minutes. He messed up and could have continued for another hour or so. But I was talking to him around the time that posting needed to be done and he got distracted. Now he is telling me to please stop at the same time he stopped at. 16 hours 15 minutes. I am sorry Erik when you read this. But that was never an option for me. You not winning was the plan all along. I can't watch Zamanda go out and I am not ready to leave this game just yet. I have some fight left in me and I REALLY want to make merge. Do I think I will even after this round? The chances are slim at best. I need to hope for a shakeup because SURELY whoever joins this tribe will just be another vote against me. Or Zamanda. So all of this is likely just to buy one more round of safety for me and her. But like I said earlier, I am alright with that. Who knows maybe I will get lucky and get some candies this round. I already talked to ED so I can count on his 2 candies for sure. Shont is going to win as well and I have been chatting her up big time. MAYBE if I am persuasive enough, she will give me hers. I may even consider playing this idol-that-doesn't-even exist-yet on Erik right now. The votes are headed his way 100% if he isn't immune and I would like nothing more than to blindside Fabio's ass right on out of here.
I am praying that this works but Step 1 is to ensure that I win immunity. Only 2 more hours to go.
If next round is a BB round, I hope for fuck's sake that the HOH is something skill based and not like fucking Poker-face or Blackjack or Monopoly or some shit. Like seriously. I need to catch a break.
If you thought I was overplaying before, you ain't seen nothing yet. Hang on to your horses bitch. Its either gonna be two HUGE moves in one fell swoop, or 2 massive swings and misses and I fall flat on my face again. We shall see.
