Before I start, here are all the cast member profile pictures re-sized for your mem wall: http://imgur.com/a/Fns9e

It's far too late to finish this confessional but I will tomorrow.

You are already more useful than all of my cohosts this season

So now we are all merged, wonderful. The merge name is awful but it's not like tribe names are a huge deal at merge anyway right? The graphic looks incred though so major props to that.

The round started off with a group chat created by Mike called "Mike's Buddies." This featured Mike, Kim, Eric, Ronnie, and I. It essentially formed a 5 person alliance who was supposed to work together in this challenge. How swell? The challenge itself seemed kinda confusing on a first look, but once read it made sense.

Except.

One.

Thing.



A white potion that made someone immune, gives them pinatas, oh and gives them THREE VOTES. Gosh dang it lol. The even worse part is seeing who ended up getting this potion given the new chat that was just formed.



So yeah that's cool. Sierra is probably giving her Satan Poison to Zmanda. PLUS Jerri and Zmanda both have nullifier poisons. Jerri voted to keep me in last round, but I don't expect that to happen again. I think her and Zmanda will probably use the potions on people they for sure don't think will vote with them and they want to target.

Meanwhile Kim, Eric, and I all got Red/Green poisons which is good. At least we will be able to spread them amongst eachother if need be. Sundra and Heather also have Red/Green poisons, but up until this point Mike has been close with Heather so we were HOPING we can figure out where she may give hers. The Blues were held by Monica, Jeremiah, Ronnie, Mike (all people working with us) and then Erik (who Kim has a relationship with).

However things were at least looking OK for our group. Mike initially had an idea but then Ronnie was able to improve and organize it. Essentially what we were going to do was spread all the poison we had across people one this other "side" that has been developing. Only 1 person not working with us (Erik) has a blue so they can only make 1 of us vulnerable as long as the reds are spread out correctly. What we can then do is idol the 1 person vulnerable at tribal and get rid of one of the others.



Sounds like a great plan right!? I mean I certainly thought so. It just relies on a lot of factors. For starters, Jeremiah had to be with us. If he blued one of Monica, Eric, Ronnie, Kim, Mike, or I, then the plan kinda goes to crap. The plan also fails if Sundra and Heather give their greens to the same person. The only problem is that Mike is basically our line of connection with Heather and she apparently is telling him.



I was always worried about Heather mostly because she always seemed so weird in my convos with her. I haven't had a lot, but the ones I have make her seem kinda fake. That's just the vibe I get from her. I also have no idea how Mike and her have a relationship and he is the one way I know anything she does. It sucks having to rely on that.

This was basically the first time I talked game with Jeremiah all game which was kinda funny considering we are supposed to be working together. I know him and Kim talk a lot and he is the reason why Yul got eliminated (and later I found out Julie but more on that later) so that was interesting. I like Jeremiah and outside game wise we actually just came off a game he won where we were very close (Pure 3 for anyone interested). I see him as basically a floater in the game and he sorta admitted it. His care levels haven't been super high and I don't blame him, long game, lots of people, etc. I basically asked him what he was going to do with the Blue poison and he was extremely indecisive. Heather asked him to give it to Monica, he may give it to Eric, hell he may even give it to Erik for the lulz. I know he's a calculated player and he is going to do what is best for him in the long run, but I hoped he would do something in our best interest.

Looking back I have no idea what I would do that. We literally informed him last minute about what was going on. He is in no sort of alliance group chat, and again, LITERALLY FIRST TIME I'M TALKING TO HIM. So this was pretty foolish of me and the results come out. Eric, Monica, and Ronnie are all vulnerable; and Ronnie and Eric got nulls played on them. The votes appear to be us with a 9-4 disadvantage if Monica, Mike, Kim, and I stick together with our vote. So yeah that's awful lol.



I am glad I am safe at least. And Kim, and of course Mike. Mike mentioned to me being glad Kim, him and I (our F3) are all safe. He also mentioned having a plan. And um, interesting, plan. He tells me about his Heather relationship which frankly I was a bit surprised about. The reason why they were close is because they came into the game together. I mean it's AS and I don't really care that's how their relationship started, but I just never expected it. Well apparently Heather hasn't been a great partner. Mike has been telling her stuff and she then goes on to tell other people who shouldn't know. She doesn't tell Mike everything. What I don't understand is why he keeps telling her things if she leaks them? Anyway, according to her the other group thinks Ronnie/Eric have an idol. But the thing is, it's not Mike's idol. Mike told Heather about the idol we made with him as soon as it happened. Ugh, that's suck to learn about and doesn't help with the whole "trust" thing. Anyway, they think they'd have access to 2 idols because Mike is going to say he is playing the idol on Eric. And Mike WILL play the idol on Eric. He claims he didn't care about looking like he was on the other side anymore because they don't include him in anything. Idk if I 100% buy that, but I'm rolling with it. So Eric actually gets idoled and then it is suspected Ronnie also gets an idol. Supposedly. Now this sounds convoluted but it may work? They would then split votes on Ronnie and Monica, but then we all vote Monica and she goes over Ronnie. We like Monica but lbr, she is kinda dead weight and Ronnie really wants to play more.

So that's all sorted(ish). Will it work? Eh I don't have confidence. Will we try to make it work? Yes. Eric is safe and that's the important part.



I'm just going to say it right now: there is no way I can work with Eric long term in the game. I 100% trust him to vote my way, it's not because I am worried he'll betray me. I am worried that he has become too much of a target and I am associated with him. I don't want to end up in the same spot as Ronnie; screwed because it is obvious I am with Eric. I feel bad but I don't think there is anything I can do. I told Eric this straight up and he just seems mad he is in the position he is. He also wasn't included in the plan Mike and I came up with which didn't make him feel any happier.



So because Eric long term is not going to work I need to make some of those deals like my other allies have. I started simple: talking to Erik. Not making any deals with him, but I just want him to not hate me. Can't be too hard right? Well at least I hope it is not. I didn't get blued by him so obviously we aren't on the worst terms ever.

But I started thinking. I need a new #2. Kim and I are really close and I mostly trust her to avoid doing anything bad for my game, but like how she has Mike I had Eric. But now I am trying to do this without Eric. So I looked at the memory wall. I needed someone who has been playing a similar game to me up until this point. Hasn't been completely in the game, but someone I have the potential to work with. Someone without much of a target. Someone I can try and trust. Someone.............unexpected.



Yup. I am going to align myself closely with someone I talked to almost for the first time this day. I know Jeremiah tends to have loose lips, so I needed to make sure he 100% thought I was committed to him. You know what, I am committed to him. I think this may be the move I need to make in order to make it far in the game. If I can align myself closely with him, someone on the outs of both sides but still kinda in the middle, it's perfect. I came off to him hilariously strong but I still think the goal was achieved. I told him straight up, I want to work with you, I think it’d be great; both of us are kinda floatery, etc. Obviously he wasn’t going to say no to my face and he sounded enthusiastic about it, but I think he is telling me the truth? We went on at length about people who we could trust and work with and etc. What it came down to was that it’d be hard to fully trust anyone we can work with except for Kim (who rn has hands in a diabetes inducing amount of cookie jars).

I trust Eric 100% but he is too big of a target, Ronnie is too much associated with Eric, Monica is pretty not active and is associated too much with Eric, Mike can be pretty shady and has proven to not be the most trustworthy individual after telling Heather (who told everyone else) about the “alliance” of Zmanda, Sierra, Kim, and I leaving his name out of it, Heather is Heather who apparently everyone hates lol, Zmanda and Kim are tight but it’s Zmanda so no idea where her actual head is at, Sierra for similar reasons as Zmanda, Sundra is just kinda “there” and we don’t have much of a relationship with her, Jerri is the same as Sundra, and Erik and Kim are also close but he’s Erik so no.

Buuut now that I’m close with Jeremiah, does that mean it is possible to get him to flip with us? Eric and Ronnie are certainly hoping so. If there is a 5-4 split, then we can idol Eric and Jeremiah would make our votes 5. There is a slight problem with that though. Jeremiah has NO reason to want to do that! Eric and Ronnie haven’t talked to him once, not ONCE, about working with him. They left Kim and I as mouthpieces and frankly that can’t work. If you want someone to trust you YOU need to talk to them. So I talked to Jeremiah about that possibility and he very straight up said he doesn’t really benefit from it. How he is kinda mad they are relying on his vote and doing nothing themselves about it. I don’t blame him, but that means Ronnie is essentially screwed.



I then began to talk at length with Kim about our positions in the game. Like I said before, I am pretty much floating but I’m sure I am still seen as a part of this group. Kim has been able to disassociate herself with from Eric enough and played both sides. The thing is, she is close with everyone now. So that makes things VERY hard when it comes to dealing with how to eliminate people. She seems to want to jump ship way more easily than I do. Jeremiah said it himself, that we can’t stick with the sinking ship that is the USS Eric & Ronnie.



I really do love Kim and I love how we are able to be so open about what is going on game wise. However a slightly scary moment (and was one of the reasons the title of this confessional is what it is) is that she said she may have made a “terrible mistake.” Oh god. So we talk about how Mike told Heather about his idol and was spreading the rumor that Eric/Ronnie have another one. WELL APPARENTLY, Heather isn’t the only person who knows about the idol lol.



Remember how I mentioned in my initial assessment of Kim that she can be simultaneously too trusting and not trusting enough of people? Well this is the “too trusting part.” So Zmanda apparently knows about like, EVERYTHING going on lol, except for being close with Jeremiah which is important. Now this CAN be good? Of course if Kim and Zmanda are close that means MOST LIKELY Zmanda won’t try getting rid of Kim or someone who Kim likes (aka me). I hate doing this because in Good and Evil this almost exact same situation occurred. She got close to people on the other side and was essentially my mouthpiece. She always told me what was going on and did things in both of our best interest, but ultimately she had a close relationship with the person and I did not. I hate that because I am relying on a relationship by proxy. I NEED to get out of this rut of not talking to people on that side because I don’t want Kim to be pressured into helping me AND it looks bad for me if I make it far. Again in Good and Evil had we both made it to the end she was winning in a landslide. But she was the bigger threat and I survived floating. Hrmmmmmmmmmmm.

I brought this up to her and being nervous about being a possible target, to which she replies with “Well like with most games everyone seems like you.” Lol, dammit. I mean not dammit because I guess that’s good? But I haven’t given a reason for Zmanda and Sierra to like me per say. I am sure they don’t hate me but I can’t see myself being well liked by them. If anything they feel indifferent towards me which I get.



So Ronnie looks screwed because Kim also doesn't think it is worth keeping him at this point. She has too many ins on the other side and she doesn't want to mess them up. I get it, but it's going to anger Ronnie and probably Eric. And if she works with Jeremiah and I eventually, she is going to anger that other side when she betrays them. That is a thing to deal with later though.

I have been trying to figure out the best possible root in the game from here on out.



Assuming Eric and Ronnie are the next 2 targets, it is likely Mike will follow. Zmanda mentioned to Kim Mike will probably go "soon." Sierra even talked at length how she didn't like how he was playing both sides and leaking info.



THEN after Mike it may be possible to get rid of the "ever so liked" Heather. Zmanda doesn't like her, Jeremiah doesn't like her. I can always hope Sierra doesn't like her? And Erik offered to Kim to make a deal with him, her, Zmanda, and Sierra so he'll do whatever they do.

What happens if Heather then goes? Well all of that logic was done in my Good and Evil Alec patented colored excel sheet. I can be very wrong but this is how I see things shaping up:



I think it is likely that Zmanda and Sierra and Kim may stick together to get rid of other floaters like Jerri and Sundra. Zmanda doesn't like Jerri and Sundra irdk. Her and Monica are such non-factors that I'd be worried about them not being targeted for it.



But it looks likely that Jeremiah Kim and I may actually get pull here. It seems unlikely for Jerri to work with Zmanda because Zmanda mentioned specifically not liking Jerri. Sundra, I have no freaking idea. Monica is going to work with Kim and I though. If we my some miracle get to an F7 of Zmanda, Sierra, Erik, Jeremiah, Kim, Monica and I, holy hell the comeback would be real. As Nelly said, it's



But this is a start. This round is going to be ugly because Ronnie will likely go, the rest of this game is going to be hard to navigate, AND I look like I'm just floating here, but I'm very much in this game. At this rate I'm not sure if I'd WIN in the end, but I plan on putting myself in the best position possible to do it.

I done goofed and used the large ones to make Ronnie and Shontayla's Ponderosa pictures if you dont mind resizing those, I'm editing in yours right now

Ok will do, sorry just saw this